Stressed, but without regrets
I’ll be honest, I have never been so stressed out! Ever. I have two months left in my senior semester and it just doesn’t seem like I’m going to have enough time to get everything done.
Yes, I said senior semester and that’s because I’m graduating early! Let me just give you the quick low-down of what I’ve been up to the past 3.5 years … (insert flashback noise!)
It all started freshman year. I started Castleton right off with a double major and knew I was going to have to work hella hard to finish in time. So, I never had a semester here where I had less than 18 credits. For two of them I even overloaded. I had a job, where I worked 15-plus hours a week. And I wrote for The Spartan. Once I got used to being that busy, any less amount of work would always make me feel guilty, like I could be doing more.
That was freshman year.
This is senior year and I still have a lot of credits, I am now the editor of The Spartan and the only thing changing in the job world is that I now have two of them and work 45 hours a week.
When do I sleep you might ask? Rarely. Did I mention I studied abroad? I spent an entire semester in Malaga, Spain, taking only Spanish language classes and I STILL am somehow managing to graduate early.
Keep in mind it’s senior year. That means there is an unbearable weight of pressure to put together my senior portfolio, write a bunch of resumes and cover letters for potential jobs, and gather every relevant thing I’ve ever done ever in one big, impressive, award-winning pile to show the world.
What do you do for fun? Do you go out? No. There’s no time for that. There’s not even enough time to do all of the things I have to do let alone things I want to do. I go to school on Sunday’s for god’s sake. Who does that? I’ll admit, I go back and forth in my head trying to figure out if I’m committed, or just crazy.
Two jobs, full-time student, extracurriculars, and preparing to apply for jobs? Too much of that is enough to give anyone a breakdown. And believe me, I’ve had them. And yes, fomo is a real thing when you’re stuck scanning groceries and everyone you know, even your professors, are out having fun on a Friday night. I get jealous. I get mad. I get sad. I feel left out.
We can’t all be as fortunate I guess.
All this work and I’m still not going to finish this semester with a job secured. How discouraging is that? Knowing you spent your entire college career grinding so hard just to have to spend months after graduation applying for jobs because you didn’t have time to during the semester because you were so busy with everything else.
I don’t think I’ll regret it though. Despite all the stress and the crying and the lack of sleep, for some reason I feel like I’ll be okay. For some reason I feel like I’ve done college right. I have really learned how to maximize my time, plan ahead, manage money, sort out my priorities, and my resume is chock full of professional experience. I think those skills are more important and useful than being Flip Cup Champion or learning how to DIY an entire wall of left over beer boxes. Besides, how important is getting drunk for three days on “Halloweekend” anyway?
I know there will be a payoff to nearly drowning myself in work. I know I’ll get a great job that I love, where I am also using my degree. I know I will be able to pay back my loans quickly,
– Carly Trombley