The Booze Bag

Hello, and welcome to The Booze Bag. I’d like to treat this page as my trusty satchel, filling it with personal stories, urban legends, and in-depth research surrounding the world of booze. Whether you’re a casual drinker with a taste for local craft brews, or an “I’ll-drink–anything-as-long-as-I-get-white-girl-wasted” type of person, there should be something inside The Booze Bag that’ll tickle your taste buds.

I find it fitting that we start with one of the pillars of the recreational drinking community: The Beer Keg

The beer keg can best be defined by as “one of the four greatest things invented for college students.” As the other three greatest inventions for college students are still up for debate, the keg undoubtedly cements its place.

The keg is the most efficient and manliest way of transporting beer. Made of stainless steel, the traditional U.S. keg can hold 165 12 oz. beers. Purchasing and consuming one of these bad boys is not a task that can be done alone. It is essential that you recruit a trustworthy group of friends to partake in the journey.


The Experience

Owning a keg is like having a child. Even in its early stages, it amazes you as you place it safely in the back of your car. “How could I be responsible for such a beautiful creation?”, you ponder as a single tear of joy trickles down your cheek. You look to your buddy, and they look back at you. There is a mutual sense of accomplishment and pride as you become parents to the beautiful barrel of delicious, ice cold beer. The young keg has so much un-tapped potential.

Next, you must choose a path for the juvenile keg. Do you consume it casually with a closed circle of friends? Or do you thrust it into a world of uncertainty by hosting a “kegger?” As defined in the Merriam-Webster dictionary, a kegger is “a party featuring one or more kegs of beer” (Merriam and Webster, always turnt up). As a kegger brings the opportunity for an abundance of good times, you must beware of the dangers that go along with it (such as 7-10 bros named chad showing up uninvited). With great power comes great responsibility, and there is nothing more powerful in the world of beverages than a steel barrel filled with beer.


The Keg Stand

The keg stand is the only way to conquer a keg. If you’re a guy, a properly executed keg stand will undoubtedly impress bae, as she will get to see you inhale beer like a man, while flexing your triceps (Nothing better than getting a pump while getting drunk, right bro???). For girls, on the other hand, a keg stand is your opportunity to be a “bad bitch” as the teens say, like Nicki Minaj or Iggy Azealia or Jenny From The Block as you outdrink all of the guys who’ve been drooling over you all night.

Here is how it works.


Canine Keg Stand?

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